I am different.

Looking at a pictures, trying to find the perfect one for my nieces birthday card, there was one that caught me off guard. It didn’t feel like it was that long ago that I took it. It was a day when Tecfidera was kicking my butt. As you may have read previously, I did not have the best experience taking that med. It was so bad that I went … No, RAN to Copaxone. Hours of side effects a day or giving myself a shot, I took the latter. Not the point. I took a picture of how red I was to show my neurologist, standing in the bathroom mirror. What I noticed was not how bad the reaction was but that I looked different.

If there is anything I can tell anyone about weight loss is that your going to look at a mirror one day and not recognize yourself. Oh, and the first time you see a picture of you is weird. Out of the body kind of thing. You get use to your face, having it for lots of year (I know the grammar sucks THERE). All of a sudden you are looking at Christmas pictures and it takes a moment to know WHO it was. It was me.

So, years ago (I will not say how many!) my Grandma gave me this long night shirt. Hearts, saying ‘LOVE YOU LOVE ME’. It is stained with hair dye, paint (fingernail and house), food, hopes, dreams … You get the point. It has been there for the good and bad. When I had a relaspe that kept me in bed for months, I wore it a lot. When we were in Hawaii, took it there too. We have history.

What I am getting at is today, as I sitting on the couch in said night shirt looking at that picture of me flushing, I experienced that feeling again. The disbelief of the changes that I have made in the last year; both physically, emotionally, spiritually and personally. Life is different, and this adventure the Hubby and I am on is amazing.

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