banana pudding

I want to tell you all about my week.

Had a doctors appointment. New doctor, new office. Can not say the office staff was super friendly, but whatever. Not the point of this story. I am sitting there, waiting. In the waiting room is a woman sitting alone on the other side of the room and in the middle of the room was a group. An older man and two women, one of whom is in a wheel chair.

‘Oh, this is a nice chair. LOOK, it has a pole. So I could hang stuff from it. Maybe I should take this one home and give them my old one. It doesn’t have a pole.’

Classy people.

As the man goes out to the car, the younger of the two woman walks over to me.

‘Is that a rose?’

HUH?

‘Your arm. Is that rose tattoo on your arm?’

OHH!

‘No, actually. They are calla lilies. And peach blossoms.’

‘IT is beautiful. Have you ever heard of blahblahblah?’(I have no idea what she said!) It is the vitamin that vegetables get when they are allowed to ripen in the sun. BECAUSE the stores don’t let them do that anymore, we don’t get that anymore. Since I started taking it, I feel better. I have lost 40 pounds. LOOK! How big my pants are!!’

… Are you telling me I am fat?

‘If you are interested, I can let you know all about it!’

… definitely calling me fat … I have lost a lot of weight … rude …

‘LOOK my clothes don’t fit at all!!’

‘Maybe you need to hit up some thrift shops and get some that do?’

‘Nah. I have a sewing machine, and a surger. I can take them in. I have to make my own underwear. The are too tall for me. Come all the way up to my arm pits. That is why I started sewing, to make my own. That’s the only way they fit. I can show you how they look and how to make them if you want me to.’

Before I had a chance to reply, I was called back.

I feel like that was one of those moments in my life that was a cross road. I could be making my own underwear right now, possibly out of cat fur. Instead, I am watching TV with the hubby. He might have lucked out either way.

Bring on the weekend.

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